Not Every Funeral Looks the Same And That’s a Good Thing

We’ve all been to that kind of funeral.

The one that doesn’t feel like the person.

Where the words are nice, but not quite right. The music doesn’t land. The structure feels like a template.

But here’s the truth: funerals don’t have to follow a formula.

And more importantly, they shouldn’t.

The Heart of a Farewell

I’ve helped families say goodbye in pubs, in parks, at surf clubs, in backyard gardens, and under gum trees. Some had speeches and songs. Others had silent moments and shared memories. Some had neither and that was ok too.

What they all had in common was this:

They felt true to the person they honoured.

Because when the tone, place, and details reflect someone’s story, how they lived, what they loved and who they were. That’s when the farewell becomes meaningful.

Some Ideas That Break the Mould

Here are just a few examples of how families have done things their way:

A surf club celebration by the ocean for a man who spent his life near the water. It included a barefoot ceremony, a playlist of classic Aussie rock, and a table of his fishing gear.

A backyard picnic with fairy lights strung through the trees, sharing stories over sandwiches and cider. No structure, just people remembering.

A pub lunch where mates raised a glass, told hilarious stories, and left a signed jersey on the wall in his honour.

A quiet, candlelit evening at home with poetry, tears, and soft music. Just family. Just love.

The Small Touches Matter

It’s not always about doing something “out there.” Often it’s the quiet details that bring a farewell to life:

• Playing their favourite song as people arrive
• Wearing their team colours instead of black
• Reading a note they once wrote
• Placing a worn-out hat, an old photo, or a cup of tea on the table

It doesn’t need to be big. It just needs to be them.

So Where Do You Start?

You don’t have to know all the answers.

You might be feeling raw. You might be unsure. Or maybe you’ve got an idea but don’t know how to make it happen.

That’s where I come in.

I’m here to listen, to ask the right questions, and to help you create something that fits, gently, honestly and without pressure.

Let the Farewell Feel Like Them

If you’re holding the weight of loss right now, please know there’s no “correct” way to say goodbye. There’s only your way and theirs.

Whether it’s big or small, simple or surprising, structured or casual, what matters most is that it feels true.

Let’s create a farewell that honours their story.